The retail industry received another shake-up today as Sears Holding Corp. (NYSE: S), the parent company behind the recent merger of Sears and Kmart, announced the acquisition of embattled European cheesemaker France (NASDAQ: FROG). The buyout deal, estimated at $2.7 billion, will position Sears/Kmart/France as the world's third largest retailer and 15th ranked military power.

"The acquisition of France indicates there will be further consolidation within the low-end, weird-smelling retail segment," said Ivan Kaplan, a retail analyst with Bear Stearns. "I wouldn't be surprised if Sears picks up another floundering discounter like Winn-Dixie. Or possibly Spain."

"Frankly, I'm worried that France has some serious productivity issues," said Kaplan"They could probably address these with a round of layoffs, but we don't have any evidence that anyone actually works there."

Founded in 1107, France was once a marketing powerhouse in Europe, commanding a 27% share of the continent as recently as 1775. However, a series of strategic miscues have sent the once-thriving cheesemaker into a steep two-century decline.

"Attention Kmart shoppers! The glory of France, she is born anew," crowed France CEO Jacques Chirac, who will continue as head of the corporation's Northeast regional merchandising division.

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