Friends, frogs.What is PaveFrance.com? Pretty simple, actually. It's just a little corner of the web where the last acceptable prejudice is practiced and embraced. Yes, it's all about making fun of the French.
Exactly two years ago today Pave's éminence grise, Mike Krempasky, though not so grise at the time, inaugurated this thing that is Pave France. The joke was the British needed more parking. The unfunny stuff was France's duplicitous opposition to the Allied liberation of Iraq.
Back then Pave was in the forefront of promoting every sort of boycott of French product and service, supporting rallies decrying recreant French diplomacy, showcasing stories of France's unfolding perfidy -- largely ignored by American MSM, and making the argument for American leadership in the world in opposition to French mischief playing ends against the middle.
France lost big betting against the Allied liberation of Iraq and continues to lose big with each dramatic development in the Middle East, where it is apparent that America -- not France -- influences events. With France's reckoning, Americans have once again relegated her to the back pages. Certainly things have quieted down here at Pave.
A once grand roster of contributors has dwindled to one and the occasional drop-by. Threads that used to swell with comments (9,307 de-spammed), now garner only a few, when they garner at all. And only God knows if Pave has a larger audience than our handful of regular correspondents. Interest has flagged, but Pave's mission has deepened.
Pave broadly chronicles the decline of France (921 entries), but we strive to get at that elusive and pernicious something at the heart of contemporary France. Were the French merely obnoxious -- well, they are, but really, who cares? Here are the questions that interest Pave: Why is France determined to queer the pitch in a world trending toward democratic ideals?; Will France disappear into the fundament of her own grand nanny statism?; and, Circumscribed by European fascism and Islamofascism will France's fractious political middle hold? The answers to these questions speak to whether something recognizable as France is still around 20 years from now.
Pave also is you, the community of astute readers and correspondents, misogallicists, French apologists, skimmers, surfers, and the curious. We will leave this post at the top of the column for the next week. Please tell us something of your Pave experience, e.g., how you came to Pave, your most memorable post/flame, your nickel's worth of philosophy on France -- or Pave.
Thanks for reading these past two years. We hope you'll continue visiting in the year ahead.
(Originally published 03.03.05 | 23:00:00)
Congratulations! I've been a lurking reader for about two years, and have enjoyed your site...it was most useful in pointing me to facts that I could use while debating a French "pen-pal" on the merits of the Iraq liberation. She later gave up and refused to respond to the facts. Truth alone indeed wounds!
Vive La Pave!
Happy anniversary!
Just heard about this site today and have already shared it with many folks. Happy anniversary and here's to staying true to your mission.
My last France experience was going to Paris on the Chunnel Train. Getting a horrible taxi driver that sat there and cussed under his breath the whole time. At what, I don't know. Could have been me - I don't speak French and we stumbled through the address of my hotel. Two days of dreary weather and drearier meetings in La Defense. Then back to London and then home.
All I had to show for my effort was a bad grease stain on a Prada blouse from an over-sauced piece of seafood, and a new, colofrul French vocabulary (thanks cabbie!).
"the last acceptable prejudice is practiced and embraced. Yes, it's all about making fun of the French."
Prejudice is all about pre-judging. While I would certainly recommend it as the best policy for everyone when it comes to france, it really isn't necessary. They have enough history to base dislikes and lack of trust on so there isn't any need.
Happy 2nd!
Pave was my first blog-home.
In my heart forever.
A new reader. A gringo working in Mexico. They still "love" the french here. But then the French did give the Mexicans one of their few military victorys.
A grateful reader.
Congratulations!
Keep it up, please.
They still "love" the french here.
Maybe for different reasons than the same old tired clichés?
They have enough history to base dislikes and lack of trust on so there isn't any need.
Oh how brilliant.
Tell the truth Jay, would you post in a "Down with Muslims" website, or is French-bashing just more acceptable in the safety of your respectable home?
You know it's true.
I'd be happy to bash you in person Zoomer.
How about a meet up on the corner of Garfield and Greenback? There is a theatre there so after I put the beat down on ya, we can go in and catch a movie. My treat.
I have one in mind already.
"Gunner Palace" does what no book, no news article, and no blog can do — it makes the soldiers of 2-3 FA come alive for those experiencing the movie, in a way they could only do if they were in person. The movie shows little of the war as we see it on CNN or in DOD press conferences; you don't learn about grand strategy or tactics, or the push/pull of victory and defeat. Instead, what you hear are soldiers' stories — from the privates to the sergeants to the captains to battalion commander LTC Bill Rabena. Some war stories will never make the nightly news.
Course you can hop over to a Disney feature if it's too reality based for ya.
Oh ya
How did I come to Pave France.
On a rediculous Item of the Day segment, Bill O'Reilly, mentioned that a French diplomat got pissed enough to formally protest about a web site (now defunct) named Francestinks.com, which had the obligatory France is like an Accordian French jokes and Mark Twain quotes, but was more a business selling western wear(boots with a big W on the side and such)then a true study of French perfidy. Francestinks had been attacked and knocked off line by some German internet bandits, so it made a headline or two, which this French fellow noticed. O'Rielly made fun of him because, of all the problems in the world for a French diplomat to get worked up about a french joke page on the net seemed pretty silly. Like are all the other problems in the world solved already? But it got my attention.
Francestinks linked over to dissident frogman. Diss is were I really got a taste for the anti French blog. He details in good natured humour the shabby condition of the French national psychi. Good stuff. Sometimes after reading diss I play the national anthem, salute the screen and end with a USA USA USA chant reminicent of an olympic hockey win. But diss has long dry spells where he posts nothing. (gestapo evasion manuvers is what I call them).
So from the diss I found Merde. Boy is Merde in your face. He is like the AP dispatch of shit France doesn't want America to see.
Good for a daily dose but eventually I felt the need to participate more - Tell a Frenchman a thing or two (Keep the damn Dixie Chicks, Micheal Moore, stuff like that).
So I found Pave.(from dissident frogman blogroll)
Saddest day I had on the net was after posting steadily for, oh, three months, finding Pave kerpoot. Defunct. Out of order. I have a file of Pave replacement sites, compiled from that terrible two weeks, which I thankfully never had to use.
Doubt any of them still work.
Most memorable flame.
Remember papafrench?
He asked me one time what kind of a prick I thought he was...
You have an archive I can access Damian?
[PT,
You tripped us up. You posted that flame under your J. Mayeau moniker. It appears below, glad to oblige.
The Management
Patrice Klajman [AKA, Papafrench] apparently you are an unconscious, masochistic prick. But since you asked I will elaborate.Your the kind of prick that when called upon to give the toast at your younger brother's wedding takes the opportunity to expound on the mans sexual exploits from his college days (the details of which you were told in confidence). The drunken soliloquy being puntuated by the mother of the bride leaving the hall in tears.
You excuse her lack of ettiquet by belching out "Must have been the drink".
Then you continue by describing in the kind of detail only attributable to first hand knowlege the natural endowments of the bride. Culminated in an invitation to the party for a viewing of her on your personal website ( where you have the video you took of the couple through your secret camera, from their visit to your home the previous summer).
Your speech then disintigrates into a drunken accusation of your Father. How he showered favor on your sibling, and how the wreckage of your life would have been so different if he would have given you the attention and love that was your due.
Just before passing out you manage to vomit on the Maid of Honor while the bridesmaids and ushers wrestle you away from the microphone.After you come to, you make a pass at the brides little sister.
Thats the kind of prick you are M. Klajman.
P.S. Your a piss poor liar as well.
Posted by: J.Mayeau on September 13, 2003 02:48 PM]
Ouch that burns.
need some water... sisssssssss better.
I'd be happy to bash you in person Zoomer.
If you mean that litterally, what makes you think you'd win?
How about a meet up on the corner of Garfield and Greenback? There is a theatre there so after I put the beat down on ya, we can go in and catch a movie. My treat.
Ah yes, the use of "meet you at some corner" and chest-stomping war references to compensate for your own inadequacies, if you know what I mean. How's High School treating you, Paper-tiggy, having trouble getting laid?
So what did you Daddy do Papertiger (mine actually fought five years in Indo-China and started as a construction worker after his return)? I bet my Daddy could beat up your Daddy.
Course you can hop over to a Disney feature if it's too reality based for ya.
Reality, Papertiger, is that the world doesn't revolve around your prejudiced little world-view. You should travel more and I mean that.
p.s. yes I love Disney classics.
Zoomer,
You seem a bit off your game today, though making that comment I am reminded of Mae West's comment re the death of Calvin Coolidge, "how could they tell?" But still, it seems a bit puerile, even for you. Maybe it is too difficult for you to ascertain the tone of a post with your English, which, I will admit, is many times better than my French.
Tell us again how the world would be better if Saddam was still in power. Tell us again how your under-equipped army has been of such benefit to us in Afghanistan. Tell us again how France really loves America, and just wants to help us to do right in the world. Tell us again how arming China, the same China which massacred thousands of pro-democracy demonstrators in Tienamin Square, and which makes a terratorial claim on Taiwan that is utterly unsupported by history, is a policy to bring peace to the world. You can do better.
By the way, I am writing this from London and the British really do need more parking.
Tell us again how the world would be better if Saddam was still in power.
This has become the default excuse for the invasion, despite no direct Al-Quaeda link, nor WMD's, but I'm not complaining. How about the same treatment for any regime you seem dangerous, brb, or are Pakistan and Saudi Arabia too useful to us to be bothered with?
Tell us again how your under-equipped army has been of such benefit to us in Afghanistan
Then why was France the only non-US nation to be asked to participate in the initial bombing phase? Not to mention the use of the FFL and special forces, use of French bases in Eastern Africa and taxpayers money to arm and train the Afghan army. Just because you have a serious anti-French bias doesn't mean you shouldn't give a little credit when credit is due.
Tell us again how France really loves America, and just wants to help us to do right in the world.
"France" doesn't necessarly mean the French in general. Read a copy of The Guardian and see how "England" really loves America (to some degree it's much worse than left-leaning French dailies). As far as doing the "right thing" in the world, there's more Franco/US cooperation than you might think (Syria, Haiti, Ivory coast, Afghanistan, war on terrorism...), but don't rely on Pave to educate you on that.
Tell us again how arming China, the same China which massacred thousands of pro-democracy demonstrators in Tienamin Square, and which makes a terratorial claim on Taiwan that is utterly unsupported by history, is a policy to bring peace to the world. You can do better.
You have a point, but btw, the UK is also in favour of lifting the embargo, isn't it? Finally I don't see you complaining about the enormous economic benefits China is offering despite - as you rightly mention - its terrible human rights record, do you?
Gents,
And it is only the guys. Please use some other thread to do the muscle flexing. We would really like to keep this thread limited to those themes enumerated in the antepenultimate paragraph of the post. Thanks.
M. Zmx,
We make a special appeal to you. You obviously have a mission here, otherwise you would have faded like so many other French apologists. Though we generally do not agree with your take on things, often, without the pretense of Pave, the hard truths of the world are not in dispute. Just as our job is to act the scourge, yours apparently is to be a gadfly. We would be interested in: how you came to Pave; why you think its important to engage in the threads with an audience you consistently criticize as parochial; your favorite insult, given or received; and your thoughts on Franco-American rapprochement if rapprochement is possible, or desirable; and anything else you'd like to get off your chest.
Regards all,
DGB
I defend the French. Why? Because they had the guts to stand up to Bush's binary escapade.
Guts? To defend Saddam? It's not guts: it's Total and Bouygues contracts, plus a 70 years-old tradition of defending dictators.
I'd be happy to bash you in person Zoomer.
If you mean that litterally, what makes you think you'd win?
I would answer, but it would just be more chest thumping. Who needs it?
Lets keep the geriatric's out of our argument
(although my father also served two tours in Indochina, he is old, and I don't relish sending him out to fight my battles).
I am curious how Zoomer found Pave, and I know that he has to have a few favorite flame wars.
Fess up.
How is that boycott going, by the way? Ah hah ha ha ha ha. Loser.
Ask the French how the boycott's going...wine and cognac sales in the American market continue to slide, and who goes to visit the francuilles anymore? No one will admit to it.
"despite no direct Al-Quaeda link, nor WMD's, "
No direct link to Al-Qaeda was claimed. There were terrorists there. Abu Nidal, Abu Abas.
And you are supposed to say "No stockpiles of WMDs" Since WMDs were found, as were pre-cursors to nerve gas, which were explained away as pesticide, a use to which, to be honest, they could have been put, but why bury them on camoflaged military installations.
And like it or not, Saddam is gone, and would not be had Chirac had his way.
Oh no - we've gone from having two Stephs to having two Dougs :/
Brb, you know perfectly well that Abu Nidal was only trying to open an Islamic theme park with financing from Saddam. That 737 body wasn't a terror training facility, it was a future ride! And I'm pretty sure that only hundreds were massacred in Tienenmen Square. As leftist purges are measured, that's hardly even worthy of notice.
there's more Franco/US cooperation than you might think ([...] Ivory coast
Ivory Coast?
I think I must have followed PT's trail of bread crumbs here. I know that I came through DF and MIF on the way...
" I'd be happy to bash you in person Zoomer.If you mean that litterally, what makes you think you'd win? "
Because Idiot your a frog. It is part of your genetic code to lose a fight when the fightin' starts.
Anyway, Happy B'Day Pave. Y'all were the ones to get me interested in blogs in general and to the wider world of information they provide. It's been a fun ride.
Zoomer,
Here is some info on the poor economic and political performance of former French colonies. I also think that one has to throw out Quebec, since it has been an English colony since the Seven Years War in the 18th century (French and Indian War around here)
http://www.coyoteblog.com/coyote_blog/2004/10/french_vs_anglo.html
Oh yeah, here is another link
In Battle of Mutual Hostility, U.S. Is Outmatched by France
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/03/14/books/14conn.html?
A bit late, but...
Happy Anniversary!
Kalroy
