French politics is a different game today than when De Gaulle made a few phone calls to the chiefs of staff or Jack shook down Parisian contractors for vote money. No, if you are seeking high office today you must look good in a bikini. You must sparkle. You must have an Oprah presence and you must be guided by Oprah handlers.

Many French politicians, knowing no better, still cling to their old buy-my-way-to-office practices. In its small way Pave wants to help and hereby commences a new series of posts especially for the présidentiables. These posts offer sound easy-to-follow advice on how to connect and win with the gloomy French public.

First out of the box: Laurent Fabius.

Candidate: Laurent Fabius (né August 20, 1946 à Paris)
Party: Parti Socialiste
Standing: ~16%

COMBOVER IS OUT
Voters Prefer Well Groomed Presidential Wannabes

Tip No.1: Shampoo at least once a week.

Tip No.2: Lose the combover. Maintain a tidy tonsorial valance or shave your head.

Tip No.3: Shave everyday during the campaign.

M. Fabius currently enjoys a 16% positive standing with the French public, down 6 points since his announcement.

PFFT (What is this?): Looking presidential ¼ | Rayonnement français 0