1,000 TO RECEIVE FRANCE'S LEGION OF HONOUR,
INCLUDING 153 RIGHTEOUS
PARIS April 9, 2007 (AFP-EJP)
Every year a select swarm of new worthies and less-than-worthies are invested into France's ordre national de la légion d'honneur, joining its roster of worthies, less-than-worthies, and unworthies*.
Upon ascension to the order one receives a fancy-dress legionnaire kit and there is a very nice party with hot hors d’œuvre and cocktail weenies jacketed in bacon.
If you are not yet an invested chevalier, you are probably wondering when you will be notified. Probably very soon. To find out how soon, Pave presents the Official Legionnaire Questionnaire, below. Tally and score your answers to determine when to pencil in your investiture.
FRANCE'S MOST PRESTIGIOUS AND AVAILABLE AWARD
Helps With Seating At Bistros, Takes Some Of The Edge Off Rude Wait Staff
OFFICIAL LEGIONNAIRE QUESTIONNAIRE
- What have you done for France lately?
- Are you a movie star, a chart-busting musician, a celebrity, a supermodel, a displaced noble, a financier, or a person of influence?
- Have you made a "donation" to the Jean-Claude Mery Legionnaire Fund (€25 minimum)?
A) No.
B) Yes.
- Who is your favorite president?
- Which best describes France?
A) Nothing really.
B) Slavishly whatever is asked.
A) No.
B) Yes.
A) Ronald Reagan
B) Jack Chirac
A) A troubled democracy betrayed by her political class, extenuated in her press, and ruled from her streets.
B) A super great place.
Award yourself zero points for every "A" answer and 100 points for every "B" answer. To qualify for the légion d'honneur requires 10 points. If you have scored more than 50 points, check your mailbox and keep the weekend open. If you have scored less than 10 points, don't despair. You are still eligible for the Ordre national du Mérite.
* Other notable unworthies include Julius Streicher, Nicolae Ceauşescu, and the nothing-personal-just-collaborating state-railway SNCF.
PFFT (What is this?): Undistinguished distinguishment 3 | Rayonnement français 0
